And I’m baaaack!!! I hope you missed this newsletter :) Let’s get straight to it.
This week’s newsletter started with reading this.
I was reminded of conversations where women have described the utter lack of support while going through menopause. “There isn’t even a proper resource to understand what’s happening,” I’ve heard someone say. She wasn’t describing the obvious physical changes. There are also such major emotional experiences associated with the time and no way to make sense of any of it. The hormonal changes, for example, or the idea that this biological transition is so deeply tied to the idea of giving “life” and being a “woman”. Even among women, there’s a cloaked shame that you’re no longer a “full” woman once you’ve hit menopause.
India is currently struggling under an aggressive second wave of Covid-19. Dr. Devi Shetty (who is an absolute rockstar. I mean, the man has figured out how to reduce the cost of heart surgery in a country where healthcare is usually only available to people who can pay for it), has said since the beginning of this pandemic that India needs more doctors and medical support staff without whom no number of hospital beds or medical equipment is useful.
Which makes perfect sense.
Becoming a doctor in India isn’t easy. You have to have the grades, the will, aptitude and money to qualify as one. One of the biggest hurdles though is getting past your own family — especially if you’re a girl. Becoming a doctor in India is encouraged, celebrated. Everyone approves — the neighbours, your teachers, even the impossible-to-please extended family.
But many women, as with several other choices, get asked how they’ll balance marriage or motherhood with a demanding medical career. Or feel under pressure to sacrifice it for either or both a few years into it.
I know of a conservative Indian family who have spoken their daughter out of pursuing medicine because it’s not “proper” for a woman. After all, it could involve touching a man (insert eyeroll).
I know of a woman in India who was forced to give up her career as a dietician (she was a gold medallist at university) after her mother-in-law passed away because the men in the family insisted they needed a woman to look after the house. Even today, this is not an unusual demand made of many women in Indian families. She had been living with her husband’s parents after she got married, as is common among many Indian families.
If you’re Indian or come from any kind of conservative/ethnic background, I’m sure you know stories like this too.
These conversations and deeply patriarchal practices mean that we don’t have nearly as many female doctors as necessary, often even when women want to consult with one.
These conversations mean that in the middle of a raging pandemic tearing through a country, we don’t have enough doctors.
It was only when more women journalists started reporting about war and conflict that the world had access to the distinct perspectives women bring to these events.
It was only when more women in senior management were also expectant mothers did they realise that designated parking closer to an office building and nursing rooms or daycare facilities at workplaces need to be a thing.
It is only when more women become doctors that menopause won’t be seen as a trivial “women’s problem” to develop the support system which so many women are currently forced to cope without. It is only when more women become doctors that insufficient doctors during a pandemic will be one less problem to worry about. It is only when more women become doctors will areas of health that overwhelmingly affect women get the attention they need.
Because the healthcare system repeatedly fails women, because doctors so often tell them they’re making “too big a deal” about their condition, women are coming up with their own solutions.
I came across Gen M (women-founded), which looks like a good place to start if you’re looking for information about menopause.
Do you know how many other areas of women’s health are grossly neglected? (All screenshots below are from the same trusted medical resource)
Like menopause, pre-menstrual syndrome or PMS is such an ignored issue. It’s not just a few days of wanting to sit in bed with a tub of ice cream while crying to rom-coms (although sometimes that’s helpful too). Considering that it affects more than 90 percent of menstruating women and covers a spectrum of physical and behavioural changes (it can affect your sleep, throbbing legs and nausea — the list goes on) SO little is known about it and much less is available to help women through it.
I use the woman-founded Clue app which is brilliant to track your period, cravings and most importantly PMS. Just knowing the timing of it has helped me so much to stop worrying about why it feels like life is doomed a few days each month.
There is such little awareness around these conditions that even as a woman, sometimes I couldn’t understand why some women were making “such a fuss” about getting their period or cramps. Until I made this podcast and listened to the stories of women who described health conditions which aren’t physically visible but that doesn’t make them any less real. Please listen (around the 21-minute mark) to one of the speakers describe how her husband got a quick and accurate diagnosis but her struggle to find an effective solution for what she suffers from is an ongoing process. She’s also started an all-women support group on Facebook.
Polycystic ovary syndrome or PCOS is such a common problem among women I know. They’ll visit a gynaecologist who might run a few tests and prescribe some medication but the relief is usually temporary. The condition throws their menstrual cycles, appetite, mood and energy levels off balance, apart from accompanying pain and other changes.
Veera Health, is a woman-founded Y Combinator backed startup to help women manage PCOS.
I’ve been binge watching Superstore and then listening to all the podcasts I can find about it. Here’s something I stumbled on in the process while listening to Lauren Ash from the show:
This is clearly a problem that transcends barriers of race and class.
Endometriosis is a painful condition which affects about 176 million people worldwide. Guess how long it takes for a woman on average to get a diagnosis from the first onset of symptoms?
7.5 years.
Here’s a good resource for endometriosis or this, founded by celebrity author, model and TV host, Padma Lakshmi.
You have to listen to this episode of Fresh Air with Dr Linda Griffith who explains the condition.
According to the WHO, in 2020 alone, 2.3 million women were diagnosed with breast cancer and 685,000 people died from it.
And I still can’t find a comprehensive resource for it that feels personal and useful. Do you know of one?
Migraines affect about 1 in 5 women and 1 in 15 men. I know so many women who suffer from blinding migraines, keeping them out of work on some days and sometimes an episode can be so severe, they need to go to the emergency room. Read about one woman’s struggle.
Do you see a pattern?
Gabrielle Jackson writes about exactly this.
Obstetric fistulas.
Postnatal depression.
Miscarriage.
All of the above isn’t even talked about enough, even among women.
And among women, women of colour are disproportionately marginalised when accessing healthcare.
Am I the only one who’s angry and amazed that so many health issues which affect women just haven’t been studied closely or thought of as important enough to find a solution to, forcing so many women to suffer in silence?
And this isn’t a new problem. Misogyny in medicine has been around for as long as medicine has been around. The most popular and possibly infuriating example is the origin of “hysteria”. Even today, it isn’t uncommon to use “hysterical” to describe a woman.
Read more about this here.
Misinformation and a lack of information has very real consequences and works against all women, like this recent finding makes clear. Arwa Mahdawi writes The Week in Patriarchy and I’m not sure I’ve loved the name of a column harder.
(Whether it’s impostor syndrome or fertility, there are so many impossible standards that women are forced to meet. When will women stop listening to the countless ways the world tells women what to do and do whatever the hell they want.)
Until more women are a bigger part of scientific research,
Unless more women are given the room and supported to pursue STEM subjects freely, without the social pressure of judgment and expectation
Until more women advocate for gynaecological problems to be given greater priority in medical curricula
and
Unless more women apply what they learn through science to explore the many many medical conditions that disproportionately affect women, the answers will evade us.
And it starts with the little things like conversations we have with young women in our homes, in our families, in our communities.
It’s always about the little things. The things we say in passing which stick.
“Boys don’t like girls who are smart”
“What’s a pretty girl like you doing with her nose in a book”
“Why study so hard when your most important job will be as a wife and mother”
Think I’m exaggerating? Read this.
Men and women still say these words to impressionable girls and they do long-term damage. We must want better for the women in our lives and encourage women to want better for themselves. The doctors we need today in the middle of a global pandemic, the ones we will need tomorrow, are currently having conversations with the adults in their lives. They have enough barriers to make it past. Let’s make sure we’re telling them what they need to hear —
There’s nothing you can’t do, you are important and your work will change the world.
In Women Wins these past weeks
Kim Janey has become the first woman and first black person to become mayor of Boston. Can I get a hella yeah!
Women are a necessary and sorely underrepresented group in senior leadership in the media which is why I’m thrilled that Kimberly Godwin will become president of ABC News, making her the first African American person and woman to hold this position for the organisation, Rashida Jones is the new president of MSNBC, Alessandra Galloni is the first female editor-in-chief of Reuters in its 170-year history and Maham Abedi will become Network Managing Editor at Global News, Canada’s public broadcaster. Women bring a distinct perspective to news coverage. We need their fresh eyes and ideas.
The US State Department has named a woman of colour as its first chief diversity officer 🙌🏼
I really enjoyed reading this by Shradha Shahani. There was something limitless and freeing about two people following nothing but the road in front of them, with only each other, their dog and wide open spaces for company. It was a lovely read at a time when we’ve been forced to stay indoors for unusual amounts of time.
My girl Shefali moved into a new office. She runs Flora Fountain, a digital marketing agency which she built with her bare hands. Do you need a website designed or help with social media? She’s your go-to girl. Join her roster of clients, many of whom are independent, women-founded businesses, including Twinkle Khanna’s, Tweak. She also co-founded Mahila Manch, an all-women comedy collective with Preeti Das. They are hilarious and badass. Follow the handle and if you’re around when they’re doing a show, go go go!
To close this week, I did some Ramadan-themed writing for Glamour UK.
And on a related note, journalist Sania Farooqui, who hosts The Sania Farooqui Show, is speaking to Asma Elbadawi about how she got the International Basketball Federation to allow the hijab in professional basketball. Subscribe to her YouTube channel and watch the episode, which drops on Monday.
As parts of the world open up and shut down and burn and heal — I hope you find something to calm you, ground you and keep you going.
xx
AA